


Sorting Hat Raven

by Jimblejambles



Series: Teen Titans Drabbles [3]
Category: Teen Titans (Animated Series), Teen Titans - All Media Types
Genre: And then Beast Boy sorts her in response, Basically Raven sorts them into their hogwarts houses because shes tired of their arguing, Because Raven has a potty mouth, Drabble, Hogwarts Houses, Swearing
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-07
Updated: 2018-11-07
Packaged: 2019-08-20 09:57:32
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 564
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16553618
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Jimblejambles/pseuds/Jimblejambles
Summary: Raven knew this was coming. It happened every time they marathoned Harry Potter. She was sick of it. Everytime it was the same argument. You would think by this point they would have concluded which Hogwart’s houses they are and moved on, but no, she was forced to endure this every single fucking time. She was sick of it. It was so obvious what houses they all were.





	Sorting Hat Raven

Raven knew this was coming. It happened every time they marathoned Harry Potter. She was sick of it. Everytime it was the same argument. You would think by this point they would have concluded which Hogwart’s houses they are and moved on, but no, she was forced to endure this every single fucking time. She was sick of it. It was so obvious what houses they all were anyway, but no, Beast Boy had to disagree everytime. If they said he was a gryffindor, he would complain that his courage comes from sheer stupidity. If they claimed he was a slytherin, he would argue that his beliefs constantly evolved. If they stated he was a hufflepuff, he would disagree and claim that he’s left too many people behind to be considered loyal. She was sick of it. The answer was right in front of them.

“He’s a ravenclaw, you idiots.” She snapped. Their eyes all flicked towards her. “And while I’m at it, Starfire is a gryffindor. Her powers literally stem from courage and a desire for justice. Cyborg is a ravenclaw. He’s always reading about how he can further upgrade his systems and his car as well as the medi-bay because Azaar knows he can’t take most of us to a hospital. And Robin is a freaking slytherin. Need I remind you of what happened with Slade? You’re all idiots.

“Wait, back up a minute.” Robin waved his hands. “How is Beast Boy a ravenclaw?”

“I admit, Beast Boy isn’t the smartest of people, but it doesn’t state you have to be smart to be a ravenclaw, you just have to be driven by a desire to learn. Beast Boy is dumb enough to try anything because he wants to learn about whether it works or not. Also, you haven’t ever seen him do it, but I know he researches animals in his spare time so he can expand his powers. Besides, what did you expect from someone who has never been to school? Like you and Cyborg went to school, Starfire had some education on her planet and I was taught enough, but Beast Boy’s never had that in his life. It’s a miracle he can read to be honest.”

“Thanks Rae. I knew you loved me really.” Beast Boy laughed. “And for the record, you’re a hufflepuff.”

“Ok that I have to disagree with.” Cyborg cut in. “No offense, but Rae isn’t exactly hufflepuff material.”

“Why not?” Beast Boy questioned. “She’s super loyal and she’s driven by her desire to protect us even though I know she’s terrified sometimes and the only reason she reads so much is to find a way to control her powers so she doesn’t hurt us by accident or to find a way to help us. Besides, Raven’s reason for wanting to stop the prophecy was to protect everyone. She’s loyal as hell.”

Raven couldn’t help what must have been a strange look she gave Beast Boy, but she was somehow struck by the way he could sometimes say the most thoughtful of things. “Thanks Beast Boy.” It was quiet, but by the beaming grin he sent her way, she knew he heard it.

“Is this not the wonderful? Raven and Beast Boy have ended the ongoing dispute of which house of Hogwart’s we are.” Starfire chimed in, forcing everyone into one of her bonecrushing hugs.

**Author's Note:**

> *sips tea and waits for the fans to come at me*
> 
> Ok, I'm gonna put this out here before y'all come for blood. I considered, Beast Boy could be a Hufflepuff as he refused to believe Terra was truly evil and he also went full on beast to protect Raven from Adonis. However, I argue that those weren't entirely out of Garfield being loyal. Terra was BB's first love. No one wants to find out the girl they love is evil or witness them turn evil. BB blames himself for what happened with Terra and so burdens himself with the responsibility of trying to bring her back to the good side. It's not entirely out of loyalty. It's out of love and feeling responsible for what happened. Then, there is the case where BB literally loses control of his powers to protect Raven. I don't think that's entirely Garfield's actions. The guy has animal DNA inside of him and a lot of animals can be very loyal, so I don't think it's really out of loyalty that BB turns into the werebeast, but more because he has this primal side which is saying "well we gotta protect her gar" and also he was under the influence of chemicals which allowed this side to show itself. Don't get me wrong, BB would have protected Raven even without the werebeast, but I think without the impact of the chemicals the werebeast wouldn't have come out from Garfield's desire to protect Raven alone. To sum it up, I think there's a primal side to BB which is very much loyal to Raven to a greater extent than BB actually is. Furthermore, despite getting on well with the Doom Patrol, BB is quite ready to leave them when the pressure gets too much, which isn't entirely loyal. So yeah, I don't think BB is quite Hufflepuff material, but I would say his primal side is 100/10 a Hufflepuff.
> 
> Then there is Raven. Raven took some thought. Raven isn't exactly confident. Like she's constantly terrified that she might lose control of her powers which essentially stops her from being a Gryffindor. You could argue that her standing up to Trigon is a pretty Gryffindor thing, but I think she does that more to protect her friends. I don't think she's ambitious enough to be a Slytherin. Like the only Slytherin trait about her is her fashion sense. She's not really that cunning, not like Robin is. Ravenclaw was a possibility, but I don't think she reads her book out of a desire to learn, but out of a fear that she might lose control and hurt others. Yeah, that left Hufflepuff and the girl is incredibly loyal to the Titans.
> 
> Robin was easy, but at the same time, it was a bit of a toss up between Slytherin and Ravenclaw. Robin has a desire to know everything about everyone. Like he researches Slade to the death. I don't think he does that out of a desire for knowledge though, but more to help fulfil his ambition. He spent days chasing Slade when he was affected by that chemical without even considering how tired the members were. Total Slytherin. Like don't even fight me on this.
> 
> Cyborg was a challenge. He's not the bravest of individuals as he's very aware of how others view him, especially children which crossed off Gryffindor for me. He can be quite ambitious with how he wants to be stronger, but he's not unreasonable and he knows his limits. He also wouldn't use another to achieve a goal to the extent Robin would so I didn't think he was Slytherin either. Hufflepuff was an option as he's very considerate of his friends, but one moment in particular struck me. He and Robin had an argument, which led to him walking away from the TT. You could argue that he did come back, but he waited for Robin to see the error in his ways thus demonstrating that he doesn't constantly support Robin's actions.
> 
> Finally, there is Starfire. She was actually the hardest to sort because she is also very loyal. Like she was willing to forgive Blackfire so many times for her actions. However, I think Starfire's loyalty is built from her innocence. She doesn't know enough about the world to always form her own beliefs so she sometimes ends up being led astray as she doesn't know if it's right or wrong. And it shows, as the show goes on, she begins to learn more about the world and begins disagreeing with Robin's leadership a bit more as she realises that he's not always in the right. However, she's still pretty loyal which meant I couldn't entirely cross Hufflepuff out. Starfire has a desire to learn, but I think it's born more out of being in an unfamiliar world and wanting to fit in more, so Ravenclaw isn't really an option. She's definitely not cunning enough to be a Slytherin. I think the deciding factor is that her powers stem from her confidence and desire for justice, which are total Gryffindor characteristics.
> 
> Wow, this ended up being longer than the drabble.


End file.
